From the bottom of my heart, I think I need to choose LLU.
I think it's a test that God want to see if I really want to give Him 100% of mine.
when I made the decision, I began to cry...like you give your favor things to somebody..
I said to God...God if it is Your will, comfort me, let me don't feel sad but full of the joy.
The whole day, God gives me a lot of word and thoughts...
but I couldn't put every pieces together...
Then A voice tell me "Don't kill Isaac!!!"
"What?! Why I want to kill Isaac?!"
God said, you've passed the test!!!
"What?! I have a lot of questions?!"
Then I thought back all the verse and thought God gave to me earlier
and everythings make sense now..
The biggest thing bother me is.. If I choose UCLA instead of LLU today..
then what I've been through before became not make sense.
But..God tole me...What I look at is your heart
and I love you so much my beloved daughter,
I know you have a heart to follow my way and obey me,
so you passed the test..I want to give you the best and what you want,
like I give Abraham Isaac, put your knife down.
As the verse I give you, I want to bless you as I promised..
"...Since this is your heart's desire and you have not asked for wealth, posessions or honor,
nor for the death of your enemies, and since you have not asked for a long life
but for wisdom and knowledge to govern my people over whom I have made you king,
therefore wisdom and knowledge will be given you.
And I will also give you weakth, posessions and honor,
such as no king who was before you ever had and none after you will have."
And God also take care of my worry..
Because I've already registared LLU and pay the tuition..
I am afraid how do I tell the school I am gonna withdraw and I may not get all the money back.
God gave me another verse,
" If the LORD delights in a man's way, he makes his steps firm;
though he stumble, he will not fall, for the LORD upholds him with his hand."
So..the process of withdrawal is very smooth, and thanks LORD, I get all the money back!
I choose UCLA, not because of its reputation and not because everyone told me to do so,
but I have a clear comfirmation from God and He told me to do so.
I know this decision make my challange become bigger and there are still many difficulties I need to face and overcome.
But I won't be afarid because I know God is always there!!
The last verse He gave me and remind me is Psalms 131,
May I walk in His way for my life and look upon His eyes forever and ever..
"My heart is not proud, O LORD, my eyes are not haughty;
I do not concern myself with great matters or things too wonderful for me.
But I have stilled and quieted my soul;
like a weaned child with its mother, like a weaned child is my soul within me.
O Israel, put your hope in the LORD both now and forevermore."
I forgot which song's lyric it is, but it's my prayer in that day..
I give You praises, My heart is full of joy.
You have filled my life with Your abundant grace.
I give You Praises, My life is in Your hands.
Every moment I'll praise, fix my eyes on You.
As I worship Him, God keeps telling me how much He loves me.
I can't stop crying..becuase He loves each one of us so deeply...